There Are No Disorganized Spiders

I was watching what I call a “fall” spider make its web on our deck and I wondered if it were a boy or a girl. I guess I could Google which one does that work, but that’s not really the point of my essay today. What really got Nelly (my inner child) and me thinking about was; are there any disorganized spiders? As I watched this busy spider making this masterpiece in silk, as if she’d (I’m going to assume it was a girl) thoroughly studied some manual on some website about web making, I thought back to see if I could ever remember seeing a rectangular web filled with heart-shaped lines or triangular webs with crosses all around or webs in rainbow colors shaped like wedding cakes? I couldn’t, and a God breeze swept over me with the realization that within that busy little girl was genius! I also had to conclude there are no disorganized spiders. (I don’t think they have as much fun as we do.)

First, this spider had to start with a plan passed down from generation to generation. If she didn’t, her web would be different and every “fall” spider web is constructed from the same blue print. I Googled, “How do spiders make a web?” (Sometimes I’m embarrassed to ask Google questions, thinking it might be a stupid question. I’m always happy when I see that others before me have wondered the same “stupid” things. I’ll tell you in a minute what I found out.) Second, she had to follow that plan. What a fresh idea! Start with a tried and true plan and follow it! Buy a calendar and a watch and use them. Mind the flight plan if you follow Flylady.

The spider (and you) have choices to make

Google told me the spider does have conscious choices to make when she’s making her web.

In this week's the Young@Heart article and video, I take you on a journey to the Organized Islands.

Forgive a Potato?

In this week's the Young@ Heart article and video, I wrote about an essay on forgiveness. Last week you saw the result of that essay in the Potato Report.

Is there anything yuckier than a rotten potato? You know that saying, “one rotten apple spoils the barrel”? Well give me a rotten apple any day! One rotten potato would smell way worse than a barrel of rotten apples. One potato would affect the whole bag, but that usually doesn’t happen because of the smell! I don’t think I could let a whole bag “go” just because the stench of one rotten potato is enough for a call to action.

I got an email from a woman who said her teacher (spiritual) asked the students to bring a clear plastic sack of potatoes to class. Each potato representing someone they hadn’t forgiven in life. In class they were asked to write the name of each person they had not forgiven on each potato. Some of the bags were quite heavy.

They were asked to carry their bag with them everywhere, putting it beside their bed at night, on the car seat when driving, next to their desk at work until they could forgive the people the potatoes represented. The woman wrote, “The hassle of lugging my bag of unforgiven people around, made it clear, what a weight I was carrying spiritually, and how I had to pay attention to it all the time to not forget, leaving it in embarrassing places.”

Disgusting gunk

Naturally, the condition of the potatoes would deteriorate to a disgusting gunk if you didn’t let go and forgive. This is a great metaphor for the price we pay for holding onto our grievances toward others.

The Potato Report

In this week's the Young@Heart article and video, I wrote about what happened on my journey to forgiving a couple people I hadn’t been able to forgive.

A few years ago I wrote an essay about the challenge I had of forgiving a couple of people I’d had ill feelings toward. In the essay I told about cutting a potato in half to represent each person and carving their names in the halves to keep on my desk until I could forgive them. Here is the report that came after that.

My Potato Report:

February 25: Halves have been on my desk for eight days. They are very scary looking, and are starting to smell like dirty feet or dirty laundry that’s been in the hamper too long.

February 26: Halves are getting soft and dark. I had an Aha Moment! It is as ridiculous to be mad at the potato halves on my desk, as it is to be mad at the people they represent. There is NO difference.

Is it the potato's fault that my office smells like dirty feet and there are gnats circling? No, the potato halves are just being what they are--- rotting potato halves. If I allow them to stay on my desk it’s my fault. Is it the people’s fault (who the potato halves represent) that I’ve been upset and angry? No, they are just being who they are. If I allow the people the potato halves represent to pull me from my joy, it’s my fault. The rotting potato halves on my desk have done nothing to me that I need to forgive, anymore than the people they represent have done anything to me that I need to forgive. There is nothing or no one to forgive, but me for having bad feelings about the potato halves and the people they represent.

In fact the potato halves that represent the people have been taking up way more energy in my mind than the people they represent. That tickles me! It shows me how silly this whole thing was in the first place and is now. Every bit of this has been in my mind! Who can I blame? ME. Who can I forgive? ME! Who loves me? ME.

Potato halves become FUNNY!

March 1: The potato halves are still on my desk only because it is very interesting to observe. It is still teaching me some stuff in a very