Challenge Accepted!

I received an email the other day challenging me on my motto “Make it fun and it will get done,” and it caused me to pause. The woman had said something about fun not leading to happiness and since I think happiness is the most important goal we can ever have, (I think it’s more important to be happy than to be organized) I had to think seriously about my definition of fun.

The word fun can conger up vacations, yachts, fast cars, parties and any of the stuff of brochures luring us in to spend money. The brochure brand of fun doesn’t make us happy. I know that from experience. Last summer Terry and I won tickets to a Wine and Jazz Festival in a park in Vancouver. The brochure was glitzy! The thought of a Wine and Jazz Festival made me happy, but in reality I only like a certain kind of jazz (much of it reminds me of being a young mother with the relentless and repetitious sound of young kids saying, “Mama, Mama, Mama, Mama”) and I’m not into expensive wines that you are expected to taste and then buy by the case. It was hot the day we went there and we’d never heard of the person who was jamming up on the stage, so we walked through the park and went home. Wheeeeee!

Clooney's Refrigerator

Young@Heart by Pam Young

My son Michael and his wife Meredith were invited by the FOX network to go to the Super Bowl and Terry and I were invited to babysit the two grandchildren ages eight (Jackie) and eleven (Brooklyn). I have such fun with these two!

The first night we were with them, when it was bedtime they both wanted me to tell them a bedtime story. Since they sleep in separate rooms I sat in the hallway with the light on so they could both see me if they sat up and it was easy for them to hear me. I love to make up stories because I never know what I’m going to say myself. I guess I should say Nelly (my inner child) loves to hear my stories or maybe she’s the one who makes them up? Whatever, I love to do it.

Rabbit ears, elephants, and donkeys

Young@Heart by Pam Young

In his breath-taking book Many Lives, Many Masters , Dr. Brian Weiss M.D. (a renown and highly reputable psychiatrist) said, "The steady day-in and day-out pounding of undermining influences such as a parent’s scathing criticisms, could cause even more psychological trauma than a single traumatic event. These damaging influences, because they blend into the everyday background of our lives, are even more difficult to remember and exorcise.

A constantly criticized child can lose as much confidence and self-esteem as one who remembers being humiliated on one particular, horrifying day. A child whose family is impoverished and has very little food available on a day-to-day basis might eventually suffer from the same psychological problems as a child who experienced one major episode of accidental near-starvation. Those day-in and day-out poundings of negative forces have to be recognized and resolved with as much attention as that paid to the single overwhelmingly traumatic event."

Pam here: I loved what Dr. Weiss said and I’ve realized because of my daily attention to Nelly my inner child, I have been able to neutralize the day-in and day-out poundings of the past by becoming aware of her against the background of my daily life that’s going on now. When we shine our attention daily on the inner child, and confront negative behavior in the moment, using love, understanding and compassion, we can almost be like our own psychologist helping ourselves to remember and exorcise the source of any bad behavior.

Loving yourself is NOT a selfish notion!

“Take the first step in faith. You don’t have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step.” Martin Luther King

When I read that quote by King I imagined myself at a staircase. (I was at the top going down.) Then I thought, ‘that’s funny, I wonder what most people envision?’

So I asked my subscribers if they imagined taking the first step up or down. It really doesn’t matter because it’s a metaphor for stepping out on a mission in faith. I spent my entire morning fielding the responses and out of more than 100 who responded only three of us picture that first step going down.

I guess some could say I need to “get a life” spending time on this, but I was really interested in the age of people and what they thought. One of the “downers” was 37 and the range in age for the “uppers” was between 28 and 72. What I loved were some of the thoughtful responses so I’ll share some of them with you. I really didn’t think it was going to be that interesting, but it sure was! I’ll tell you at the end why I think I envision stepping down instead of up.

From psychology of dreams, going up represents a climb from unconsciousness, into consciousness, so a person, who envisions climbing up, has made a resolution to begin something in the conscious awake state. The climbing down represents taking what you know from the conscious level and looking for roots of a problem or the seeking for a resolution from the unconsciousness or dream state.

Joanne