Every single day we're given opportunities to grow and enjoy life more! (Even in a pandemic.)

Years ago, a woman wrote that she'd been married for 25 years. Her husband had cheated on her more than once and she'd “lost” herself and hardly recognized her home or her person. (Could be the way some of us feel because of COVID.)

But it's never too late to change your life! This woman had successfully raised two happy sons and worrying about what her husband did and not focusing on the important job she was doing, could very well have given him (in his dishonest mind) a good excuse for the affairs. Focusing on getting her act together and not worrying about him, could have erased that excuse he probably used; "My wife's fat and the house is a pigsty." 

When someone is unfaithful it's his/her problem. It’s only OUR problem if we make it ours.

Let happiness come from you before you seek others to make you happy.

I love this quote by Abraham Hicks. Happiness is just a string of happy moments. But most people aren't aware of the happy moments, because they're too busy trying to have a happy life.

Children's existence is a string of happy moments. My 3 year-old great grandson came over to our house with his mother, the other day and almost the entire time he was here he was happy. We adults did any distracting him away from his happy play, mostly to minimize messes and keep him safe. Children have a natural desire to have fun and as we grow up, we douse our happiness with being adults. 

What's exciting to me is, we can be adults and follow all the adult rules, but that child in us can help us be aware of the happy moments that bombard us every day. June is filled with potential happy moments just waiting to be had, but if we get too busy, too adult, the happy gifts of June will be gone and then there'll be July to miss. 

I met Nelly in 2002. She’s my inner child and constant companion, I discovered that keeping in touch with Nelly helps me catch lots of those happy moments, and when a few hours go by and I haven’t heard from her, I do as any mother would do; I check up on her. 

I might ask myself, “Is something bothering you little girl? You don’t seem very happy right now.” If I’m still and listen, I’ll get an answer that would've remained unexpressed had I not questioned myself.

When children are ignored, whether they are real or within, they want attention and they will get it.

I received an email one day from a woman who challenged my motto “Make it fun and it will get done,” and it caused me to think about what I mean by that. She said something about fun not leading to happiness and since I think happiness is the most important goal we can ever have, (I think it’s more important than being organized) I had to think seriously about my definition of fun.

The word fun can conger up vacations, yachts, fast cars, parties and any of the stuff of brochures luring us to spend money. The brochure brand of fun doesn’t make us happy unless we already are. Don't you know that from experience? This pic was taken at Senior Frogs in Cancun. The Frog definitely knows how to play and get not only children, but adults to have fun if they want to. I remember on that outing one of our grandchildren was upset about it all. It was too loud for her and she wanted no part of it. She was an example that joy has to come from within in order to have fun.

Clooney's Refrigerator

It's so much fun getting to know some of you on a personal basis through the consultations I do. I’ve learned so much about how alike we all are in our SHEness (Sidetracked Home Executive-ness). To learn more about talking with me, please go to www.cluborganized.com  then to the Get Organized tab.

I recently talked to a very fun-loving and brilliant SHE named Pat, who emailed an update after our talk. She has been gracious to let me share her thoughts. 

She said, “I enjoy creating a mess. That's part of the trouble I had a long time ago; I couldn't understand why I should clean up such tiny messes, when it felt so fun to clean up a big mess. Unfortunately, after a while I just kept putting off the cleaning up until it was too big a mess to clean up!”

When I read that comment, it made me think about the Ta Da affect we SHEs love. I thought about what Pat said about liking to make a mess because it’s fun to clean up! I liked it too. I remember when Mr. Cranky (my first husband) would go on the road (he was a traveling salesman) I’d let the house unravel. It was soothing and relaxing to have him gone. He’d be gone four days at a time and that’s enough time to create some very big messes that verged on scary!

Give it up

When my sister and I got organized, we both discovered we had to let go of the need for a Ta Da moment. There’s no Ta Da in a little clean-up, so we have to get used to mini Ta Da moments.

It was summertime when I got organized. I was 34 years old and I'd hit bottom. Someone said, “The bottom is a great place to be because there’s nowhere to go but up.” Not until I hit bottom did I surrender to my situation and ask for the guidance that’s available 24/7. That’s when miracles happen. In that moment of surrender I was reminded that even though I was in a mess, I was in the right place with the right people, I was just fine and the only element I really lacked was direction. Following a direction is a spiritual issue.

In my 43-year career helping moms get organized I’ve come to one big conclusion about being organized: it’s about mind management, not time management. There are thousands of books giving you direction, but until your mind is changed the direction won’t be followed.

Before you read the 7 things to think about when it comes to getting organized, I’d like you to pretend I’m one of your guardian angels and you've prayed to get organized and I’ve been assigned to work your case. I love the assignment because I’ve always loved you and to work with you personally is exciting to me!

So, I’m sitting on your chest when you wake up in the morning and I can’t wait to see you open your beautiful eyes so we can start our fabulous day together. But you’re so tired, you miss the joy before you. I should have known that’s how it’d be because you played on the computer until 2:00 am and every time I tried to get you to go to bed, you ignored me. 

When you finally went to bed, I wished you a wonderful night’s sleep, but you didn’t hear me because you conked out before I was finished talking to you. Anyway, now it’s morning and you stagger to the bathroom, tripping over shoes you left in the pathway to the toilet. (I was able to block your fall.) By the way, I love to hear you swear! We don’t get to do it here in heaven, so it’s fun to hear (sort of like when you first tried out a swear word when your mom wasn’t close enough to hear).

As your days progress I try to get a few words in edgewise. Little suggestions like, “Look at your calendar Love,” “Get a drink of water Sweet One,” “That job won’t be that bad, put your timer on for 15 minutes and start Darling,” “Don’t take that comment personally, what he thinks of you is none of your business,” oh and “God loves you,” “I love you,” and “Please be kind to yourself Blessed One.” 

Sometimes you listen and take my guidance, but most times you just don’t hear me or you say, “I’m too busy, too tired or I don’t have time. (I really get a kick out of that last one!  I wish you knew how funny you are when you say, “I don’t have time.” LOL My Adorable One, you have all the time in the world.)

All day, every day I am there and I’ve watched you struggle with this lack of direction for years and years. Your team of angels has led you to the House Fairy and Club Organized and it’s because of us you read, if or when you read Sidetracked Home Executives, and The Joy of Being Disorganized. But I can’t really help you until you let me. Until then I just have to wait, but remember I have all the time in the world too and there is no pressure. 

Mind you, while I wait, I keep myself busy. I’m here to love you and surround you with light which is a fulltime job. Oh, and I’m constantly on the lookout for things that’ll make you laugh, get you to dance, sing and play because when you’re busy enjoying your life you are one with God and that joyful energy lights up the planet.

By the way, you are here to enjoy the ride and I’m like your personal tour guide with wings. Now you can read Pam’s 7 things to think about.

Love,

Your Angel

You are Your Own Best Teacher

If you're a good sleeper, could you teach another person the best way to fall asleep? Probably not, because drifting off to sleep is unique to each person. Terry says I fall asleep within four or five minutes from the moment I put my head on my pillow. If I tried to impose my falling asleep techniques on you I would be remiss. 

Only you can figure out the best way to fall asleep. Sure I could give you some suggestions like, don’t have a television set in your room, turn off the lights and don’t have any electronically glowing digits announcing the exact time, but as far as the ritual that will put you to sleep, it has to be yours alone.

I could not fall asleep in the nude (I’ve tried it and every time, I’ve ended up putting pajamas on.) Mind you I didn’t say nightgown. I can’t sleep in nightgowns because the thought that it will end up all bunched up around my sweaty armpits by morning keeps me awake. I have to have pajamas on and the waist can’t be too tight and I don’t like button up tops because the buttons get between my breasts and bug me.

Have you HAD it with your disorganized life? 

No matter how old you are, it's never too late to get out of your mess. 

I was 34 years old when I hit bottom. Someone said, “The bottom is a great place to be because there’s nowhere to go but up.” Not until I hit bottom did I surrender to my situation and ask for the guidance that’s available 24/7. That’s when miracles happen. In that moment of surrender I was reminded that even though I was in a mess, I was in the right place with the right people, I was just fine and the only element I really lacked was direction. Following a direction is a spiritual issue.

In my almost 42 year career helping moms get organized, I’ve come to one big conclusion about it: it’s about mind management, not time management. There are thousands of books giving you direction, but until your mind is changed the direction won’t be followed.

Angel Speak

I’d like you to pretend I’m one of your guardian angels and you've prayed to get organized and I’ve been assigned to work your case. I love the assignment because I’ve always loved you and to work with you personally is exciting to me!

So, I’m sitting on your chest when you wake up in the morning and I can’t wait to see you open your beautiful eyes so we can start our fabulous day together. But you’re so tired, you miss the joy before you. I should have known that’s how it’d be because you played on the computer until 2:00 am and every time I tried to get you to go to bed, you ignored me. 

When you finally went to bed, I wished you a wonderful night’s sleep, but you didn’t hear me because you conked out before I was finished talking to you.  Anyway, now it’s morning and you stagger to the bathroom, tripping over shoes you left in the pathway to the toilet. (I was able to block your fall.) By the way, I love to hear you swear! We don’t get to do it here in heaven, so it’s fun to hear (sort of like when you first tried out a swear word when your mom wasn’t close enough to hear).

As your days progress I try to get a few words in edgewise. Little suggestions like, “Look at your calendar Love,” “Get a drink of water Sweet One,” “That job won’t be that bad, put your timer on for 15 minutes and start Darling,” “Don’t take that comment personally, what he thinks of you is none of your business,” oh and “God loves you,” “I love you,” and “Please be kind to yourself Blessed One.” 

Sometimes you listen and take my guidance, but most times you just don’t hear me or you say, “I’m too busy, too tired or I don’t have time. (I really get a kick out of that last one!  I wish you knew how funny you are when you say, “I don’t have time.” LOL My Adorable One, you have all the time in the world.)

4 Steps to Win

Are you always arguing with your mate over a messy house?
Do you think clutter control would help? Would you guys stop arguing if this problem were solved?

If you answered yes to these questions, I might be able to help! I must warn you I’m not a marriage counselor and I am on my second marriage, but I have learned some successful spatting strategies in the 45 years I’ve been married and you just might find them helpful.

My ideas will work for many kinds of fights, but to illustrate my strategies, I decided to pick a fight that’s common among couples; clutter. The underlying cause of couple’s clutter conflicts is my-stuff vs your-stuff which is the most common cause of a bout about clutter. One sees his stuff as his stuff and the other guy’s stuff as clutter and it works the other way around. It’s a blame game and couples have been playing it since Adam and Eve argued about whose leaf was whose that got left on the ground and who ate the apple and threw the core on the floor.

Common, clutter clashes ignite when stuff gets lost, stuff gets left out, stuff gets thrown out, stuff gets wrecked, stuff gets dirty and stuff gets stuffed just to get it out of the way.

Every single day we're given opportunities to grow and enjoy life more!

A woman wrote that she'd been married for 25 years. Her husband had cheated on her more than once and she'd “lost” herself and hardly recognized her home or her person.

It's never too late to change your life! This woman had successfully raised two happy sons and worrying about what her husband did and not focusing on the important job she was doing, could very well have given him (in his dishonest mind) a good excuse for the affairs. Focusing on getting her act together and not worrying about him, could have erased that excuse he probably used; "My wife's fat and the house is a pigsty." 

When someone is unfaithful it's his/her problem. It’s only OUR problem if we make it ours.

When you take time every day to be alone with yourself, away from phones, the Internet and noise, you'll be giving yourself a loving gift.  Get selfish about making time. Insist on it, and don’t allow anyone, especially yourself, to talk you out of it.

Here are what I consider six benefits of quiet time.

1. Lighten Up

When we get stressed out, it’s so easy to lose touch with that sweet calm that's always there for us to tap into. In a relaxed state, your mind quiets down and then you can connect with a deeper sense of purpose and good. Meditation and medication are derived from the Latin word medicus, to care or to cure. So a time of quiet calmness is the most effective remedy for a busy and overworked person.

Anytime you feel stress rising, heart closing, mind going into overwhelm, just bring your focus to your breathing and quietly repeat with each in-and-out breath: Breathing in, I am here; breathing out, All is well. If you have a set of words that help you relax and can be in time with your inhalations and exhalations by all means use those words. These are the words I use right now. They may change down the road.