We are wired from conception to be happy. No one has to teach us to laugh, we're born with the gift. Happiness is a choice and like any muscle we've been given, we have to use it or it has a tendency to lose it's power.

That's why my sister Peggy Jones and I decided to write The Sidetracked Sister's Happiness File. We figure out a way to use 3x5 index cards to include what makes us happy in our daily routine. 

In this short video, I read an excerpt from the book: 

Whoa Mama! Nelly, my inner child, has control of the keyboard for this blog! Look out! She’s wild!!! WARNING, this blog could make you hungry, but it might help you lose weight!

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Pam just spent a week in Seattle taking care of her son’s monkeys. That’s what they call the kids; Brooklyn 16 and Jackson 14. She was so excited to get to play with them! Except Brooklyn had finals all week and spent most of her time in her room studying, or at the library studying, or at her girlfriend’s house STUDYING and she couldn’t play with her very much. But Jackie and she played Gin Rummy a lot and they got to talk like two grown-ups when he wasn’t at school (I just listened in).

But here’s the part you’ve got to know: the monkey’s house was loaded with carbs!!! Oh there was lots of healthy food too, like fresh berries, broccoli, romaine, tomatoes, bacon, eggs, milk, avocado and yogurt (full fat Greek), but the carb section was impressive to me.

1. Face the problem in full light

2. Assess what you can do to solve it

3. Create a plan of action

4. Do at least one action every day according to the plan

5. Be patient and persistent

6. Know you’re not alone

1. FACE IT  

It’s never too late to change your life. When you don’t like something in your life you have to be able to illuminate the cause of a problem and what part you’ve taken to create it in the first place. If you can't see your part in the problem, and blame someone else for it, you have no control over the change. You can’t get anyone to do anything they don’t want to do.

One divorced woman wrote that she’d been married for 25 years and her husband had cheated on her more than once during the marriage and had ultimately left her for another woman. She said she hardly recognized her home or herself and she blamed him. Then she realized in spite of a cheating husband she’d successfully raised two happy children and she needed to stop worrying about what her husband did and focus on what she was going to do.

She figured he probably felt he’d had a good excuse for the affairs because she’d gained a bunch of weight and was not attractive, she hadn’t had the energy or desire to be intimate with him because of her unhealthy body, the house had gotten out of control and she was a full time homemaker and felt guilty for her shortcomings.

It occurred to her if she were to get her act together, she’d get her life back, her body back and her home back. She didn’t mention anything about wanting to get her ex back. It took her a little over a year to reach her goal and she was looking forward to flaunting her new self (in a size eight, mother-of-the-bride suit) at their daughter’s wedding.

As a parent, you can nurture your children's imagination by providing good books that inspire them to imagine and art supplies that give them a way to express their creativity. If they’re musical, be sure to give them access to musical instruments. One of the best gifts you can give your kids is clutter-free space in which to create.

It’s also a good idea to encourage kids to share their dreams when you’re at the breakfast table every morning, as sharing dreams will cultivate the child’s ability to remember their dreams and learn from them. Children love to talk about their dreams, I know because whenever I get the privilege of being with a messy-haired, sleepy-eyed child, I always ask and it always turns into a wonderful and creative discussion. Try it tomorrow morning as you sit and enjoy the start of your day with your kids.

FEDERAL GOVERNMENT URGES AMERICANS TO

LIMIT SUGAR TO 10% OF DAILY CALORIES

That was the headline in the Friday, January 8, 2016 issue of USA Today.

This is great news and it's about time the word got out to the masses. It'll send warning ripples to the food manufacturers, drug companies and of course the doctors who have been prescribing statins all these years.

YES, the very first paragraph in the article says, “Concerned about the cholesterol and fat in your diet? That’s so 2015.” (It should have said, “1960” because the science has been known and ignored since then).

The article went on to say, “If you want to stay on the cutting edge of nutrition advice, what you should really worry about are added sugars, according to a new report from the federal government that urges us to cut back—way back—on sugar.” 

If you wonder what that means to you, the dietary guideline recommends you have no more than 12 teaspoons of sugar a day and there are 10 teaspoons of it in a Coke or most soft drinks.

What I learned from Dr. Childers, my low-carb physician, was that by going on a low-carb diet (synonymous with sugar-free) fat is good for us. It’s not the evil we’ve been told it is. Once you know that, it’s so easy to cut out sugar! You quit buying low-fat this and low-fat that and you get fat back in your diet and your cravings for sugar literally disappear!

See, in order to cut out fat in food, food manufacturers had to add sugar, because foods with the fat sucked out of them, suck. So we ended up with shelves full of low-fat, processed food loaded with SUGAR. And we all got fat and sick. (The article goes into depressing detail on the medial costs because of what we’ve been previously told to eat and not eat.)

My book The Joy of Being Disorganized is the first book I’ve written that makes a great gift!

I believe there are 10 SHEs (Sidetracked Home Executive) to every BO (Born Organized) and I wrote this book to celebrate our SHEness!

There’s a modified 3x5 get organized system in it that'll really help you get help from your family. Here’s what Allison, a successful banker, had to say:

Dear Pam,

Thank you for writing The Joy of Being Disorganized. I’m a successful banker and am organized at work, because there are systems in place and I handle my staff with understanding, patience and support. But my home has been another story. Somehow, I let my disorganization at home undermine my self-esteem. I didn’t even know I was doing that, until I read your book. What a wake-up call for you to tell me to celebrate my disorder! And how could that possible help me get my home organized? All I can say is that it was a shift in energy!

 Edible "Indoor" Snowman

Imagine serving this hors d'oeuvres at your next party: A snowman standing more than a foot tall, on a platter surrounded by raw vegetables or cocktail crackers. Guests will wonder what they’re supposed to do with him, until they dip into his luscious "snow" or cut into him for a chunk of his insides. Then they’ll keep returning for more, until the poor snowman is left looking like his brothers Frosty or Olaf on a bad day.

Here’s the recipe which is just one of 75 recipes in The Phony Gourmet, which is now at a low clearance price of $5 plus postage and handling. This hardback cookbook originally sold for $15.

Cream Cheese and Garlic Snowman

Serves 15 party animals

1 8-inch round loaf French bread

1 5-inch round loaf French bread

1 round French roll

2 8-ounce packages Philadelphia Brand Cream Cheese (original) softened

2 teaspoons Lawry’s Garlic Powder Coarse Ground with Parsely

1 teaspoon Lawry’s Seasoned Salt

1 teaspoon onion powder

1/3 cup milk

¼ cup instant mashed potato flakes

1 leaf red cabbage (snowman’s scarf)

1 baby carrot (nose)

8 peppercorns (eyes and mouth)

5 coffee beans (buttons)

2 cinnamon sticks (arms)

1 cardboard toilet paper tube (hat)

1 square of black felt (hat)

1 (15-inch) wooden skewer (spinal column)

1. In a medium bowl, mix together cream cheese, garlic, seasoned salt, onion powder, and milk until smooth.

2. Place the larger loaf of bread on a large serving platter. Frost with half the cream cheese mixture. Stick the wooden skewer through the middle of the large loaf. Stick the medium-size loaf onto the skewer to make the second “snowball.” Frost the second ball, leaving enough cream cheese mixture to frost the third ball. Stick the French roll onto the skewer for the snowman’s head. Frost, and decorate, using items suggested in the ingredients.

3. After the snowman is decorated, shake the instant potato flakes all over him. They look just like snow and are remarkably tasty with the cream cheese “frosting.”

The Phony Gourmet came close to being a cooking show on television, but my sister and I weren’t willing to live five months out of the year in LA. Our six kids needed us at home. This video is the open from the pilot show.

Do you love to make a "To Do" list every day?

If your daily housework is a habit, you don't have to make a To Do list for it and you're probably never too busy to do the next thing that needs to be done on a daily basis. If your kids are grown and you've gotten used to the reduced workload, of raising a family, you've probably forgotten how busy young moms are these days. All it takes is to have one or more grandchildren for a few days and it all comes back to you what our busy moms are dealing with today. One mom of four said, "When my husband comes home at the end of a long day and wonders what I've done all day, I figure if I can account for all four of his children, I've done my part." 

Do you ever put things you’ve already done on a list, so you can cross them off. That's great if you do. We need all the sense of accomplishment we can get. That got me to thinking, what if we made a list of things we don't have to do today, it'd be very fun and give us a sense of relief! It's so important for us to seize every moment we can in joy, and do things that tickle us, especially when we're on the verge of feeling overwhelmed. 

This thing called life is whizzing by you without your notice. Just like we aren't aware of how fast our little planet is spinning and flying through the cosmos, we miss the speed in which our lives are hurtling through time. 

So, if you’re inclined to make lists and add auxiliary tasks you did that weren’t on the list in the first place so you can cross them off and feel more productive, you'll love this list of 5 things you don’t have to do today. Now if you want to write them down so you can cross them off, you’re going to have to write the word “don’t” in front of each one, but really, just enjoy the list!

Time to pull out those 3x5s

How many times have you made Get Organized be your New Year's Resolutiion? When it comes to getting organized, it’s such a juicy project complete with visions of peace, joy, beauty and order in your home.

But if you’re not careful, the thrill of victory can end in the agony of defeat. It’s hard being human, but it’s even harder when you beat yourself up because you're disorganized and didn’t achieve what you set out to accomplish because of it.

Getting organized just enough to please you is so simple, but being creative you can blow the whole project up like it’s a major motion picture.

Because you are creative, there’s nothing you love more than a new project, except for maybe breakfast, lunch and dinner! You get so excited and enthusiastic as you dive into a new mission with astonishing glee. But like the poem you learned when you were a kid, “First came love, then came marriage, then came pushing a baby carriage,” projects have a honeymoon period and then the reality of the situation kicks in and sometimes the work can be a drag.

Don't you just love the aroma of something cooking in the kitchen all day? 

One of my low carb cooking videos is Crock Pot Chili. How can it be low-carb? More meat, less beans. This chili recipe is so easy to make, it smells great while it cooks and if your family likes chili, they'll love this recipe. 

As they say in restaurants nowadays....."Enjoy."

This is a sweet and inspiring letter from a successful, longtime SHE (Sidetracked Home Executive). It’s so well written, it deserves to be shared (with her permission). Enjoy her humor and SHEness.

Dearest Pam,

You and Peggy came into my life in the early eighties. I sat in the middle of a big, beautiful new house after our tenth corporate relocation, indulging in a well justified tantrum. (I sometimes fear this will be the episode my three now, adult daughters will bring up at my wake.) Not a pretty sight. I enrolled the girls in their new schools that day and took myself to a bookstore for purposes of covert procrastination. It was there where God lassoed me with a copy of Sidetracked Home Executives: from Pigpen to Paradise.  Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Through your words and your humor and your stories you mentored me, gave me sanity one 3 x 5 card at a time, and were, well...my
friends. The two of you reflected the relationship I had with my sister, except for the fact that we lived 1500 miles from each other. And I'd found myself again a stranger in a new city. I read every book you published again and again and sometimes remember your stories as things that happened to me. (Not a good sign.)

Rewards for Doing Boring Household Tasks

Let’s face it, most household tasks are mindless and boring and you’d be a moron if you had fun scouring toilets and scrubbing floors, or I guess you could be a BO (Born Organized). But to have a clean, cozy peaceful home, someone has to take care of those unexciting chores.

If you can’t afford to pay for help or you haven’t trained your family to help (that’s a whole other blog and a chapter in my book, The Joy of Being Disorganized), you’re stuck doing them. It does help to play your favorite upbeat music while you work, but let’s face it, boring is boring.

There is a light at the end of the mop! Today, we’re so fortunate to have wonderful ways to counter the mundane. Introducing, entertainment as a reward!

A Juicy Carrot

We’re drawn to romance novels, two-hanky movies, reality TV, trashy check stand journalism and glossy magazines that feature the latest celeb pregnancy. (The mother of quintuplets once told me that with five babies she didn’t have time to read magazines, but she got enough of a celeb fix waiting in line at the grocery check-out and reading just the headlines.)

The definition for “loser” depends on the circumstance in which a loser finds him or herself. One definition has to do with losing at a sport, gambling or some kind of game or competition.It sucks to lose, but if we’ve been raised by loving people who taught us how to be good losers, we spare ourselves being the “bad sport.”

So you lost at Monopoly and landed on Park Place laden with hotels, or you didn’t win the Miss America contest; boo hoo, big deal. It’s not like you fell off or climbed down from some social ladder, but you’re still considered a loser. Anyway, that’s not the kind of loser this blog is about.

SHEs are Natural Losers

I know for sure we SHEs (Sidetracked Home Executives) are losers, because we spend a lot of our valuable time looking for stuff. As SHEs, we’ve had a lot of experience calling the Lost & Found departments in various establishments like hotels, restaurants, theaters, airports etc. and like the guy who doesn’t take car maintenance seriously and becomes known by the local towing company in town, SHEs usually get to know the Lost & Found people in familiar institutions like the building at work, the kids’ school, your school, your gym etc.

In this blog, I’ll share two ways to curb the search for your stuff. In part 2, I share two other ways we lose; one from loss of loved ones through death or disease and one from theft.