Thank you to all of you who prayed for me through some very dark times. I’m so grateful for all the positive energy that was wafted my way and especially in the hospital as I had to be in there alone. Never did I feel alone. I felt the presence of love from all who prayed for me. I’ll be forever thankful that you took the time to pray for me.
I’m still in a beautiful bubble of gratitude for another day with a normal heart beat. I was supposed to go on television yesterday, “Afternoon Live” in Portland, Oregon via Zoom. I put make-up on for the first time in nine months! An hour before the show I discovered our internet service was down. I couldn’t get to the producer (we email) to tell her our problem. When I called her number at the studio, I got her voicemail. All dressed up, drenched in television make-up; I walked out of range of our internet service, and was able to send an email telling what happened. A half hour before my segment, they were able to rearrange the show.
Since I looked better than I have in nine months, I told Terry he needed to take me out to lunch and celebrate another afib-free day and the fact that I can clean up pretty good.
I thought it’d be good to share what I was going to do on “Afternoon Live,” “Getting Along During the Pandemic.” I told the producer, “I’m not an expert in the field of marital health and I need to warn you I’m on my second marriage, but I do have some good advice.”
I saw a cartoon recently of a husband and wife. She had a very mad face and he had that look of despondency. She said, “Would you stop opening and closing your eyes so much! It’s so loud!”
- Pick Your Battles
The number one piece of advice is to pick your fights. It’s fine to argue over things that really matter, but what really matters? This pandemic has helped us to know what really matters.
Don’t fight over the fact he leaves the toilet seat up, put plastic wrap over the hole and he’ll learn what it’s like to get wet in the middle of the night. Experience teaches more than words.
- Establish a Specific Place to Argue
Terry and I disagree politically, so when we need to discuss something we go to the garage. That way we don’t contaminate our bedroom, dining room, living room, or deck with the negative vibes arguing leaves in its wake.
- Boredom Can Cause Friction
In West Yellowstone there’s a facility for bad bears. The ones that can’t be let back out into the wild because of bad behavior like eating children, stuff like that. To keep the bears from getting bored in captivity, every night after the bears have been out and about in their enormous yard, and put back into their cave/cages at night, a crew with back hoes comes in and rearranges the trees, rocks, bushes and logs to create a new scene for the bears in the morning. They also recruit visiting children and give them small plastic buckets filled with bear treats: herring, meat scraps, nuts, bread, berries and such and have them hide the treats all over the yard. When the bears are let back out, they get to forage and enjoy new territory.
We don’t need to hide treats for each other, but we can move the furniture around and give our rooms a fresh look.
- If You’re Going to Fight Do This
a. FEED HIM FIRST
You have a better chance of winning an argument if your opponent has a full stomach, especially if it’s a man. You could eat too if you think that would help you stay kind.
b. FIX YOURSELF UP
Get dressed in something you love and feel pretty in. Put on make-up and fix your hair. If you look like a dog don’t expect more than a bone.
Hope that helps create more peace in your home. This book can help too.