We want a happy home.

We intuitively know there is peace when there is order. We want our homes to be peaceful, organized and a joy in which to live, love and play.

In a book called The Tipping Point, the author, Malcom Gladwell, really grabbed my attention when he wrote about the Broken Window Theory. It was the brainchild of criminologists James Wilson and George Kelling. Kelling wrote, “Crime is the inevitable result of disorder.” Getting organized reduces crime.

I’m not saying because your house is a mess you’ll inevitably rob a bank or shoot your husband, but it’s a fair guess you’ve been late for church because you couldn’t find your car keys and broke the speed limit to get there on time, or you’ve been pulled over for driving under the influence when really you were just trying to put a little lipstick on while getting to your meeting.

Wilson and Kelling claim, “If a window is broken and left unrepaired, people walking by will conclude that no one cares and no one is in charge.” They tell about the horrible crime in the New York Subways in the 90s and that by cleaning up the graffiti on the outside and inside of the cars, crime plummeted! A cluttered room, among other things is like graffiti. It’s symbolic of the collapse of a system. It sends a message that no one’s in charge and no one cares.

Here are 6 simple household tasks that convey the same message as the graffiti-free subways did.  

Is there a broken window in each room?

Let’s use the metaphor of the broken window in each room of our homes and make “repairs” that will take you less than five minutes each. That means that in about 20 minutes you can fix five windows and you’ll show yourself and your family that you are back in charge and that you care.

If you’re a mom you have the most valuable job in the world.  

You are raising citizens of the United States of America (or put in the name of the country where you live). Unfortunately being a mom is not held in as high regard as it should be.

Easter is April 16 this year!

As we come together to celebrate the awesome miracle of Jesus's Resurrection, the sugar manufacturers have, once again, given us very colorful reminders (if we can make that mental leap) to remember what Easter is really all about. Let those brilliant Peep bunnies remind you of all the people who follow His teachings, and let that collection of multi-colored M&Ms remind you of all of your blessings. Don't EAT them, just let them remind you of how blessed you are and how grateful you are that Jesus did return in love for us all.

With that said, we really need to be careful not to buy into the sugar push in the name of this holy event. We can actually use the ubiquitous goodies to remind us that it's NOT ABOUT SUGAR. Try it the next time you're at the store. The minute your mouth starts to water because you just spied a display of Cadbury Eggs and you remember how much you love them, just swallow, pass the treats and run a quick thank you to Jesus.

I received this email and it's what inspired the subject of my blog today.

        Dear Pam,

How to stop worrying and doubting.

When you doubt, you’ve stopped trusting the power that created the Universe. Such a silly thing to do when it’s put that way, don’t you think? If you plugged a lamp into the socket, and the light didn’t go on, you’d figure either the bulb was burned out or you hadn’t paid the electric bill. In other words it would be something on your end that caused the light not to work. You would never doubt that the power of electricity was no long effective.

So when you doubt yourself or have doubts about some event or another person, the problem is on your end, because the power that created the Universe has your back and there's nothing to worry about. So how do you fix your end of this deal? I’ve come up with 6 ways to be positive so you can stay hooked into the joyful source of your life and see the truth that all is well.

1. Put yourself first

The most important thing to do when you feel doubt is think something that makes you feel good. Sometimes it helps to go outside to summon happy thoughts or read spiritual material that fills you with positive energy, or look through a travel magazine and focus on a dream vacation. Only you, know what will cheer you up. It really helps to build a list of thoughts that lift your spirits, so when you get down in the dumps you can refer to it. I call it my First Aid Kit.

Maternity Awards? Could there be such a thing?

It's graduation time again, and it got me to thinking about it, which lead me to the idea of celebrating. I looked up the definition of celebration and it said: a joyful occasion for special festivities to mark some happy event.

When we’re young, because we’re growing and changing, there’s cause to celebrate those achievements of going from grade school through high school and college, as well as celebrating the holidays and birthdays.

If we work at a job, there’s usually the annual awards banquet giving out Employee of the Year statues and BO (Born Organized) achievement pins and certificates. I know because as a keynote speaker, I’ve sat through hours of achievement awards presentations. 

But what about us moms? Yeah we might get a Hallmark card once in a while, but there’s no annual awards banquet for Mom or Dad.

Also, a great graduation gift idea below.

After Party Meltdowns

Part of training children is dealing with APM. It can happen after a party, a special holiday or any overindulgence. I’ve seen it played out in all three of my kids and all 12 of our grandchildren. Child psychologists call it over stimulation.

I remember being in the back seat of our Ford family car and coming home from a glorious day at the circus. My sister and I were decked out in new matching dresses and new shoes we’d got just for the special outing and we started fighting over whose circus program was whose (even though they were identical).

The battle triggered a rash of admonishments from both of our parents in the front seat. Dad was first, “Girls, knock off the bickering or I’m gonna stop the car and take the programs away!” Mom chimed in, “I can’t believe you girls are fighting after all we’ve done for you today. Here we take you to the circus, you got brand new matching dresses and new shoes and we let you have hot dogs and Cokes and souvenirs and you’ve been fighting ever since we got in the car!” I recall feeling ashamed.

APM tends to go into remission as children mature, but the potential for its reoccurrence remains even into adulthood and it sneaks out in adults in subtle ways but it’s no more attractive than the episodes children display.

APM can start with just an, “is-that-all-there-is” feeling. It can emerge as a vacation winds down, as we drive in the driveway with a cranky knowing of what was put off in order to have the fun. It can appear in the form of the “full” feeling after a feast, or the frustration of receiving credit card statements in January reflecting the joy of holiday purchases. Acquisition is fun! Maintenance sucks and so do the bills that follow it.

Your appearance is tied to your age. 

Right now, how old would you like to look? If you ask a 30-year-old, she’ll probably say, “25.” Ask a 40-year-old and she’ll say, “Between 25 and 30.” A 50-year-old generally wants to look 35 to 40. When you ask a 21-year-old, she absolutely won't want to look six or 11 and could almost want to look older!

This issue for women wanting to look younger than they really are is surely a desire that’s been perpetrated (especially on women) by the media. Do you think our early ancestors worried about looking younger than they actually were? Doubtful, because when you’re in survival mode you’re more worried about staying alive than how long you’ve been doing it. 

Do you like to shop for spring at Ross Dress for Less? Do you make the same mistake I make, if I'm not careful?

The other day I had a half hour to kill before I had to be at my chorus practice, so I decided I’d go to Ross and just browse. I’m sure this isn’t right, but I do it often, especially at Ross; I buy something not because I really love it, but because its original price is horrifyingly high and the mark down is too good to pass up.

The first item I put into my shopping cart was a good example. It was pajamas by Ellen Tracy (she’s expensive) originally $70.00 for $21.99! How could I pass up a savings of $48? Never mind the designer brand sleepwear was in a leopard print in purple and lime green and just about the ugliest pajamas I’ve ever seen. (Sorry Tracy.) But in my mind, the $48 savings canceled out the obnoxious look of them. Besides pajamas are worn in the dark and I did love the luxurious feel of the fabric.

The next item that went in the cart was a bath lotion I swear smelled just like a cinnamon roll. I think I was especially attracted to it because I was hungry and I hadn't had a cinnamon roll in years (and won’t in the future because my husband Terry and I are low-carbing it these days). I didn’t stop to ask myself why it’d be cool to smell like a treat, but I’ve noticed recently that many toxic-free health care products often smell like some kind of food like lime, caramel, cloves, chocolate, apples or pumpkin pie. 

Sometimes things can get a little hectic during the holidays, especially if the gathering is at your house.

Here's a grand idea using children's imaginations to keep them busy for an hour or so before the feast is served. AND you'll end up with a festive holiday tablecloth that'll end up a valued keepsake.

All you need is a twin-size flat sheet, some butcher paper (or newspapers) and marker pens and you'll see what can happen in your home. Watch this short video and let your little artists take over.

Watch this DIY video and see how fun it is.