Inner Child 101

Three of my books deal with problems I've faced in my life; being in debt, being over weight and being disorganized. My unique,fun-loving approach to solving these challenges have to do with getting to know the child that resides in me.

In the beginning I saw my inner child as a brat because I recognized behavior that was laced with entitlement issues. But as time went on, I grew to adore this child, filled with ideas for having fun and enjoying life. This is a photo of me when I was four. As an adult, when I look at this photo, I know what this child went through by the time she was this age. I'd been hospitalized three times, with each stay being a week long. My parents were constantly worried about my health and I remember Mom saying she and Dad treated me like a fragile house plant.

By the time I was in school, I loved being outside and still do to this day!   

I'm positive my inner child whom I named Nelly has written much of my work in the last decade. When we realize a child gets to be with us wherever we go, we feel young and frisky and our creativity soars because it's tied to our gift of imagination. 

I received an email from a woman who had finally discovered her inner child and wrote with such beauty and insight I just had to share it with you.

Hello Pam,

I finally met her – The Princess Irene. I was looking for a brat, but she didn’t fit the description (although she plays havoc with me just the same). My husband and I are just beginning to think about down-sizing, as we are the only two people left in our big family home. I was so excited, I started doing real estate searches online, and found the PERFECT place – a cute little float home! No grass for him to mow, no weeds for me to pull, wood floors so no carpet to shampoo.

I absolutely fell in love with this place, but he said it wasn’t in the right location and we couldn’t afford it until after we sold our current house. My feelings were so strong, I began to become aware it wasn’t just me alone feeling like I had to have this particular place. It was the Princess Irene who wanted it so much and made such a big deal out of it, that she had me in broken-hearted tears.

You see, the Princess Irene wants everything to be perfect and she thinks when things are perfect, THEN Real Life will begin. It began to click with me as I began to remember how I felt back when I was ten. Back then, the number 20 was my favorite number. It was the prettiest to look at and it sounded the prettiest to say it. I just KNEW that when I turned twenty, my growing up would be done, and I would BE a grown-up and be everything I wanted to become and that my Life would begin. I could hardly stand my tenth birthday because there were still ten more years to wait for it to “happen to me.” But that’s just what I did. I waited for my perfect life when I turned 20.

I had just finished reading The Princess and Curdie by George MacDonald and I thought that Irene was the prettiest name. I wanted to be twenty year old Princess Irene with a perfect life. I loved the Moon more than the Sun, and I loved the Evening Star. Pale blue was my favorite color. My bedroom colors that I chose were pale blue, beige and white. I still like that combination to this day. I loved things to be peaceful, including things between people. I loved to read and to play alone and to walk in the woods imagining fairies. Altogether naive, unrealistic, idealistic and impractical…but I had my “Great Hope” of turning twenty some day!

I viewed the world as a great big park belonging to God. And since I was his child, that made me feel like a princess and since the park-world belonged to him and I was his child, it was part of my family heritage and therefore also belonged to me. I really did walk around feeling that way! LOL I lived in a dream world, in a fantasy land.

I just realized today, that Princess Irene still waits inside of me. She is imagining how it will be when it is all perfect. She still believes that if (blank) happens, or arrives, or is true, or is mine, then Life or Love or Happiness will be perfect and complete, and then the Adventures will start to happen.

I just realized that she really and truly believes that this float home she’s been drooling over (which she named in her mind “Argo Navis, the Magical Ship of Adventure”!!) will fix what she considers to be the imperfect, dull bits and the drudgery of her life. She wants it so bad, because she wants to turn it into a Stage where the perfect life can be enacted and where true intimacy will finally happen (she thinks).

Well, when I realized what this was all about, and what had been going on, I burst into tears at the revelation. Maybe she is the one whose eyes help me to imagine. Maybe I, the grown up, need to maintain a realistic perspective on this, yet make provision in our own home for Irene to set herself a stage to play “Perfect Life” and maybe she and I can work together now, and be good for each other.

Now that I know she is there, and understand where she is coming from, a lot of the mysteries of my past behavior are being revealed to me. It’s like meeting a long lost friend. Fortunately, I know how to keep her on track and we’re going to have lots of fun together from now on.

Thank you for your unique outlook on things and your kooky ideas, which are making so much sense to me now. I am forever grateful!

Glenna & the Princess Irene

Glenna’s email is profound! Her Princess Irene is a precious and wise child and Glenna will become the "perfect" guardian to her. Her fantasy as she called it IS true. The world is God's garden and if we'd be like little children (like Princess Irene is) we'd know it throughout our lifetime. Trouble is, as we grow up we look to the future or worry about what we did in the past and we forget to "be" here in God's garden now. Abraham Hicks said, "A happy life is just a collection of happy moments, but most people don't allow the happy moment, because they're trying to get the happy life."

Glenna has made a huge discovery and it took a very open mind and heart to come to this point in her life. I’m sure she’ll treat this princess like a princess and compliment her, talk to her, love her and guide her through all the adventures life has in store for her right NOW!

Life is good, all is well.

Love,

As I said at the beginning of this blog, that I've written several books about the challenges I've

had in my life and how Nelly has helped me solve them. If you're having financial problems, I suggest reading "The GOOD Book: Get Out Of Debt" and you'll see how my relationship with Nelly gave me tools to get out of debt and you can use them too. Just click on the cover for more information. During the month of January I have a special for you. If you purchase "The GOOD Book: Get Out Of Debt" and "The Mouth Trap: the butt stops here!" you get them both at 50% off!