Stop Watching the News!

In this week's Young@Heart article and video, I share with you how if you stop watching the news if it upsets you, you’ll be happier for it.

Back in 1929 when the stock market crashed, we didn’t have CNN or FOX or news or the Internet. Our grandparents (or great grandparents in some cases) didn’t get over-fed the news 24-7. They got a newspaper once a day (maybe) and they listened to the radio (maybe).

Because of this age of information we can be (if we choose) bombarded with bad news because the access is as close as our finger on the clicker or the mouse on our computer. It’s one thing to be aware of what is going on in the world, our country and our community, but it’s quite another to watch the reruns and regurgitated opinions of “the experts” as they re-hash the re-runs while we click to another channel to watch the news covered from a different camera angle.

The GOOD NEWS is that to the media, the only newsworthy material is what is negative AND sensational. Dog Bites Man, is not “news.” Man Bites Dog (and don’t forget to put music behind the story) is. (I learned that from my journalist husband.) It is the extraordinary that makes “the news.” So most everything you see on the news is unusual and extraordinary. IT IS NOT THE NORM. But we in our naivety (or stupidity) allow our sweet minds to watch what happened not once but on the hour until the next day when the next batch of bad news is ready. How many times do you have to watch the bank robber caught on tape? Isn’t once enough?

We cause ourselves needless suffering

I know we’re human and most of us are naturally curious about bad news.

These are a Few of My Favorite Things

One of the best ways to get through hard times is to change your mind. I know sometimes that can seem to be very hard to do, but really we make it as easy or as hard as we choose. My experience has taught me that you can’t think two thoughts at the same time and I have experimented with that truth for more than 45 years and I know for sure it is impossible to do. So what? Well, the bad news is, when you think a “worry” thought and stick to it for a bit of time, your beautiful mind searches your hard drive for more thoughts to add to the initial worry thought. In a few minutes you can be sucked into a pity party of your own making. The good news is the same thing can happen with a “happy” thought.

Remember in The Sound of Music when the Von Trapp children were terrified by the thunder storm? Maria sang “My Favorite Things” to them and they danced and sang and jumped on the bed and had a pillow fight and the storm was out of their minds.

Below I have printed out the absolutely brilliant lyrics for My Favorite Things (written by Oscar Hammerstein II) (pronounced HAM-err-styne), followed by my own lyrics to the same tune. I guarantee that if you were feeling bad when you started reading my essay, you'll feel better when you finish reading Oscar’s words. As you read each line think for a few seconds about what it means to you. My lyrics don’t come near to the poetic brilliance of Mr. Hammerstein’s, but they do make ME feel good! Maybe you can write your own words or at least make a list of your favorite things and carry it with you to read every time you start to feel sad or bad or worried or mad or. . .oh well, you know what I mean.

Then you won't feel so bad!

My Favorite Things lyrics by Oscar Hammerstein

In this week's the Young@Heart article and video, I share with you how cutting out a few happiness sappers you can easily raise your happiness quotient.

Help Control Your Weight With Your Cell Phone

Yesterday, I went to Cramco (Costco). We call it Cramco because we usually cram our trunk full, put stuff in the back seats, in the passenger’s foot space and on the passenger’s lap. After more than seven years of stopping Nelly (my indulgent inner child) from having the big, 12” all beef polish sausage on a bun they sell for just $1.50 with a 20 ounce soft drink, I caved. For seven years I’d drooled looking at the poster of that meal, with mustard, catsup, onions and relish running the length of the dog and I always managed to distract Nelly.

I don’t know what came over me; I wasn’t even hungry yet. I know Nelly was especially attentive the night before when our neighbor told about the wondrous time they had in Leavenworth, Washington this last weekend. Leavenworth is one of the top 10 Oktoberfests in the US. I can’t think the word “Oktoberfest” and not think about sausage! It just doesn’t happen. So perhaps sausage was still on my mind when the poster caught my attention and reeled me in for the buy and subsequent feast.

The food concession at our Cramco in Vancouver, Washington is located on the way out of the store, so I’ve noticed shoppers park their over-loaded, over-sized carts while they order and eat their food before heading home with their treasures. Before I knew it I’d parked and was standing in line. My heart was racing as I looked at the other choices. A chocolate frozen yogurt for $1.35 (another poster I’d drooled over many times).

The hits keep coming!

In this week's the Young@Heart article and video, I share with you the three most important words in my vocabulary when it comes to conquering negative thoughts.

There Are No Disorganized Spiders

I was watching what I call a “fall” spider make its web on our deck and I wondered if it were a boy or a girl. I guess I could Google which one does that work, but that’s not really the point of my essay today. What really got Nelly (my inner child) and me thinking about was; are there any disorganized spiders? As I watched this busy spider making this masterpiece in silk, as if she’d (I’m going to assume it was a girl) thoroughly studied some manual on some website about web making, I thought back to see if I could ever remember seeing a rectangular web filled with heart-shaped lines or triangular webs with crosses all around or webs in rainbow colors shaped like wedding cakes? I couldn’t, and a God breeze swept over me with the realization that within that busy little girl was genius! I also had to conclude there are no disorganized spiders. (I don’t think they have as much fun as we do.)

First, this spider had to start with a plan passed down from generation to generation. If she didn’t, her web would be different and every “fall” spider web is constructed from the same blue print. I Googled, “How do spiders make a web?” (Sometimes I’m embarrassed to ask Google questions, thinking it might be a stupid question. I’m always happy when I see that others before me have wondered the same “stupid” things. I’ll tell you in a minute what I found out.) Second, she had to follow that plan. What a fresh idea! Start with a tried and true plan and follow it! Buy a calendar and a watch and use them. Mind the flight plan if you follow Flylady.

The spider (and you) have choices to make

Google told me the spider does have conscious choices to make when she’s making her web.

In this week's the Young@Heart article and video, I take you on a journey to the Organized Islands.

Forgive a Potato?

In this week's the Young@ Heart article and video, I wrote about an essay on forgiveness. Last week you saw the result of that essay in the Potato Report.

Is there anything yuckier than a rotten potato? You know that saying, “one rotten apple spoils the barrel”? Well give me a rotten apple any day! One rotten potato would smell way worse than a barrel of rotten apples. One potato would affect the whole bag, but that usually doesn’t happen because of the smell! I don’t think I could let a whole bag “go” just because the stench of one rotten potato is enough for a call to action.

I got an email from a woman who said her teacher (spiritual) asked the students to bring a clear plastic sack of potatoes to class. Each potato representing someone they hadn’t forgiven in life. In class they were asked to write the name of each person they had not forgiven on each potato. Some of the bags were quite heavy.

They were asked to carry their bag with them everywhere, putting it beside their bed at night, on the car seat when driving, next to their desk at work until they could forgive the people the potatoes represented. The woman wrote, “The hassle of lugging my bag of unforgiven people around, made it clear, what a weight I was carrying spiritually, and how I had to pay attention to it all the time to not forget, leaving it in embarrassing places.”

Disgusting gunk

Naturally, the condition of the potatoes would deteriorate to a disgusting gunk if you didn’t let go and forgive. This is a great metaphor for the price we pay for holding onto our grievances toward others.

The Potato Report

In this week's the Young@Heart article and video, I wrote about what happened on my journey to forgiving a couple people I hadn’t been able to forgive.

A few years ago I wrote an essay about the challenge I had of forgiving a couple of people I’d had ill feelings toward. In the essay I told about cutting a potato in half to represent each person and carving their names in the halves to keep on my desk until I could forgive them. Here is the report that came after that.

My Potato Report:

February 25: Halves have been on my desk for eight days. They are very scary looking, and are starting to smell like dirty feet or dirty laundry that’s been in the hamper too long.

February 26: Halves are getting soft and dark. I had an Aha Moment! It is as ridiculous to be mad at the potato halves on my desk, as it is to be mad at the people they represent. There is NO difference.

Is it the potato's fault that my office smells like dirty feet and there are gnats circling? No, the potato halves are just being what they are--- rotting potato halves. If I allow them to stay on my desk it’s my fault. Is it the people’s fault (who the potato halves represent) that I’ve been upset and angry? No, they are just being who they are. If I allow the people the potato halves represent to pull me from my joy, it’s my fault. The rotting potato halves on my desk have done nothing to me that I need to forgive, anymore than the people they represent have done anything to me that I need to forgive. There is nothing or no one to forgive, but me for having bad feelings about the potato halves and the people they represent.

In fact the potato halves that represent the people have been taking up way more energy in my mind than the people they represent. That tickles me! It shows me how silly this whole thing was in the first place and is now. Every bit of this has been in my mind! Who can I blame? ME. Who can I forgive? ME! Who loves me? ME.

Potato halves become FUNNY!

March 1: The potato halves are still on my desk only because it is very interesting to observe. It is still teaching me some stuff in a very

Set your Emostat on "Happy"

In this week's Young@Heart article and video, I wrote about setting our intention to be happy regardless of our circumstances.

I wonder if the guy who invented the thermostat got the idea from his own emotional meter. Consider an emostat. Instead of temperatures imagine words on a meter with emotions like miserable, overwhelmed, worried, desperate, optimistic, hopeful, happy, and blissful.

When I think about the happy people I know personally, one of the attributes they seem to have in common is a wonderful outlook on life. It’s like they have an emostat that’s programmed for joy and contentment no matter what happens to them. Unfortunately many of us have emostats set on negative emotions, but we can always reprogram them for happy by deciding to practice being joyful regardless of the forces outside of us. What’s interesting about setting an intention of being happy all the time, is when something pulls you from that place you know it and you can kick in and put yourself back on happy. Abraham Lincoln said: “Most folks are as happy as they make up their minds to be.”

Is your emostat properly adjusted?

There’s no guesswork in knowing your emostat is off. When you realize it consider these four things first; Am I thirsty? Am I hungry? Am I tired? Do I need some fresh air? Usually one of those four deficiencies will affect your emostat. When those four elements are taken seriously and taken care of, it’s much easier to stay on happy.