3 Keys to Having an Organized Home

Part two

As I said earlier, but it bears repeating, in the 40 years that I’ve been helping women who were desperately disorganized, there has been a common thread that connects them. It’s a thread of love, caring, compassion and creativity and a desire to have an organized home and a happy family. Many have told me personally they didn’t think they could get organized. Many had given up, until a light went on in a blessed AHA moment.

Be sure to read Key #1 Decision if you haven’t already. 

This blog is about commitment. I hope you’ve done the assignment for Key #1 and are ready for Key #2. The women I’ve met over the years who suddenly realized it was possible to have a clean, cozy organized home, discovered a dormant spark just waiting to be ignited. The spark is usually flamed because of commitment.

Key # 2 Commitment

Once you’ve made your decision to have an organized home, be committed to it. The best way to stay committed to anything is to go into it for the right reasons. If you got married because your husband was a good dancer and he looked like George Clooney, you’re probably not still married to the handsome hoofer.

I was 35 years old when I finally made the decision to get organized for the right reason. All my futile attempts prior to that were based on trying to make my husband, my mom and my friends think well of me. Eleanor Roosevelt said, “You wouldn't worry so much about what others think of you if you realized how seldom they do.”

 

4 Steps to Win

 

Are you always arguing with your mate over a messy house?
Do you think clutter control would help? Would you stop arguing if this problem were solved?

If you answered yes to these questions, I might be able to help! I must warn you I’m not a marriage counselor and I am on my second marriage, but I have learned some successful spatting skills in the 41 years I’ve been married and you just might find them helpful.

My ideas will work for many fights, but to illustrate my strategies, I decided to pick a fight that’s common among couples; clutter control conflicts. (Wow that’s a tongue twister: couple’s common clutter control conflicts. I dare you to try and say it five times without screwing up.) The underlying cause of this conflict is stuff. It’s the, my-stuff vs your-stuff which is the most common cause of a bout about clutter. One sees his stuff as his stuff and the other guy’s stuff as clutter and it works the other way around. It’s a blame game and couples have been playing it since Adam and Eve argued about whose leaf was whose that got tossed on the ground.

 

The other common clutter clashes ignite when stuff gets lost, stuff gets left out, stuff gets thrown out, stuff gets wrecked, stuff gets dirty and stuff gets stuffed just to get it out of the way.

Organize Clutter? No Way!

Well, I guess there is always a way. You could go to one of those organizer stores and get shelves, storage containers, a label gun, jars, little drawers and a hundred other cutesy products that ring your wanna-be-organized chimes, but guess what! If you really took on a project to organize your clutter, you’d end up with a home that resembles your local Goodwill store.

Clutter is the greatest destroyer of peace in a home. There’s a way to bring more peace and it starts with getting rid of what you own that no longer serves you. I remember a headline in the Oregonian: Reformed Slobs Sweep Homes Clean Including One Husband. I’m not suggesting this to you.

Get the Picture

Just imagine your home peaceful and free of clutter as I take you on a make-believe tour of your home, room-by-room.

 

Have you HAD it? Is it OVER? Do you wash your hands of it? Do you give up and say UNCLE? 

 

Is that how you feel about your disorganized lifestyle? Well STOP IT!  

I was 34 years old when I hit bottom. Someone said, “The bottom is a great place to be because there’s nowhere to go but up.” Not until I hit bottom did I surrender to my situation and ask for the guidance that’s available 24/7. That’s when miracles happen. In that moment of surrender I was reminded that even though I was in a mess, I was in the right place with the right people, I was just fine and the only element I really lacked was direction. Following a direction is a spiritual issue.

In my almost 40 year career helping moms get organized I’ve come to one big conclusion about being organized: it’s about mind management, not time management. There are thousands of books giving you direction, but until your mind is changed the direction won’t be followed.

Angel Speak

I’d like you to pretend I’m one of your guardian angels and you've prayed to get organized and I’ve been assigned to work your case. I love the assignment because I’ve always loved you and to work with you personally is exciting to me!

So, I’m sitting on your chest when you wake up in the morning and I can’t wait to see you open your beautiful eyes so we can start our fabulous day together. But you’re so tired, you miss the joy before you. I should have known that’s how it’d be because you played on the computer until 2:00 am and every time I tried to get you to go to bed, you ignored me. 

When you finally went to bed, I wished you a wonderful night’s sleep, but you didn’t hear me because you conked out before I was finished talking to you.  Anyway, now it’s morning and you stagger to the bathroom, tripping over shoes you left in the pathway to the toilet. (I was able to block your fall.) By the way, I love to hear you swear! We don’t get to do it here in heaven, so it’s fun to hear (sort of like when you first tried out a swear word when your mom wasn’t close enough to hear).

As your days progress I try to get a few words in edgewise. Little suggestions like, “Look at your calendar Love,” “Get a drink of water Sweet One,” “That job won’t be that bad, put your timer on for 15 minutes and start Darling,” “Don’t take that comment personally, what he thinks of you is none of your business,” oh and “God loves you,” “I love you,” and “Please be kind to yourself Blessed One.” 

Sometimes you listen and take my guidance, but most times you just don’t hear me or you say, “I’m too busy, too tired or I don’t have time. (I really get a kick out of that last one!  I wish you knew how funny you are when you say, “I don’t have time.” LOL My Adorable One, you have all the time in the world.)

5 Decluttering Questions!

Imagine this: You fill a big suitcase (the one that always weighs more than 50 pounds when you check it at the
 airport) and you cram it with all the fall and winter clothes you haven’t worn in the last year. Maybe many of the garments haven’t been worn in several years. If you haven’t worn a garment in the last year, what makes you think a year from now you will?  

If you did this, you'd lose 50 pounds of clothing that was otherwise clogging your closet and if the suitcase is an old one that's probably seen its last flight, you could drop the whole, loaded suitcase off at Goodwill, You'll feel 50 pounds lighter spiritually! Clutter is the biggest destroyer of peace and decluttering closets, cupboards and drawers brings a peace that money can’t buy!

The weather in March is unpredictable and it reminds me of the challenges of raising happy, healthy organized children. Every day is different and moms have to learn to be flexible and handle the ever-changing bodies and personalities of their children, year-in and year-out. As a mom, and in my career helping disorganized moms create peace and order in their homes, I learned that the less clutter there is, the more peace there is.

Think about what Mother Nature does with her planet with the changing of the seasons. She starts over every year. She de-clutters all through the winter, leaving it looking naked of life and then in the month of March, she starts to usher in spring and gives hope that the harshness of winter will soon be over. As spring peeks through the barren landscape it promises freshness and new life.      

De-cluttering is a family affair